Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Really, This Breaks My Heart

Okay, so this may seem like the lamest post ever, but its my blog so whatever... Oh, and if you're super liberal, just skip this one because you will likely take offense to my more conservative views.

Because we don't have cable I watch TV either via or whichever TV network streams shows on their website (like LOST on ABC, which I am super behind on). When that doesn't work we have Netflix and if its not on instant play I have to wait for the DVD to arrive in the mail the 'old-fashioned' way. (I still can't believe I'm blogging about this.)

Anyway, I used to love watching Jon & Kate Plus 8 on TLC! They were a great Christian family, their kids were adorable, they were tackling the near impossible with grace and humor, and I loved seeing their kitchen cabinets adorned with scripture-written index cards. Plus, they made my parenting two children (at the time) seem like cake.

By the time their relationship hit hard times we had already cancelled cable and so left in my mind was the happy fun-loving Gosselin's from the early days. Of course I heard about their split here and there but thought for sure they'd work it out. And they didn't. Enter Netflix and I was able to 'catch up'.

The last season they have on instant play is season 4 where Jon and Kate renew their marriage vows. Being a Christian and a Wedding Planner I was of course interested in their wedding. What broke my heart was when they explained to their kids WHY they were renewing their vows, the significance behind it all, that they were promising with their children (and America) as witnesses that they would be together forever.

That must have been a hard one for them to explain away to their children....

Something I noticed at the end of that season 4 was how Jon openly said that he didn't want to do the show anymore. He is private and wanted his life back. Kate was obviously not on the same page and she reasoned away his reluctance to do another season.

Ahhh.....let this be a lesson to us women! Not that anything Jon did was justified in any way (adultery never is), but as Christian women we should not emasculate our men (and I know from personal experience how that can be easy to do at times)! We are always saying that we want our husbands to lead our family's but only if that fits in with our agenda and plans? Kate showed Jon disrespect so many times during that show. I wonder where they'd be if she reverenced him, affirmed him and had really listened to his concerns regarding their new-found fame? I would bet LOTS that they would be living it up in their nice big house with their 8 adorable babies, happy. Not perfect, but happy. And I have a feeling they would both give up everything right now to have their family back together.

Anyway, their whole situation breaks my heart. More proof that no family is immune to this type of destruction. And no matter who they end up with, that person will never understand all the time and sacrifice that went into having two sets of multiples, 8 kids total. No one will ever appreciate that experience or relate to it like they do.

I did a post a long while ago about this awesome book entitled "Created to be His Help Meet". No matter how you feel about your role in marriage, or where your marriage is right now, if your desire is to have a healthy, Christ-centered, happy, lasting marriage: read it. It totally challenged my views. I admittedly hated the book for a while, but God's truth (whether I liked it or not) was all over it. Check it out.

So what do you think? As a Christian rooting for another Christian family, did your heart also break?

p.s. At the beginning of this post I said that this is probably the lamest post ever....lame because I hate discussing celebrity couples, not lame because of my conservative views. And I am positive that this post was my needing to vent after watching GMA last week (yes, online) and learning that Kate will be on Dancing With The Stars. Every time I see her (with her new hair and all) I feel sad for her and her family and I pray that something good would come out of all this for them.


Taryn said...

There's definitely a price to fame. It is too hard for a lot of people to handle. They get consumed and forget their priorities. You're right, it is sad.

Our Family of 5 said...

Awesome post- my views exactly. And I felt the same way with that last was heartwrenching to watch. I will have to read that book. Thanks!

Amy said...

Finally someone agrees with me! I've been saying forever that she put him down, and one day he wouldn't put up with it anymore. He didn't handle it correctly however, which just made the whole situation awful. Those poor children are left with two selfish parents who only care about their fame. Good post!

char said...

I never saw but a few episodes of Jon and Kate but I felt that same way when Jessica Simpson and Nick broke up. She could have been such a positive role model for young Christian girls and they could have shown the world a view of a Godly marriage but she went against her husband where their money, fame, and reality show was concerned (sadly with the help of her ex-preacher dad) until their marriage was no more. After making such a big issue out of the fact that she was saving herself for marriage I wished she would have worked harder at keeping that marriage. They broke my heart!

Yankee Mama said...

I agree, very sad.

We have no cable either so I do the exact same thing as you hulu and Netfix.

I JUST started watching "John and Kate plus 8" for the first time this weekend. I knew from the media (aol to be exact) about their breakup but never had watched the show. She really does disrespect him a lot on that show-I was cringing watching.

Also, I read "Created To Be His Help Meet" as well and couldn't help but think of that as I watched.

Truly humbles me, just a reminder to be on guard. The enemy loves to destroy families.

Jessica said...

I agree completely. I wasn't a big watcher of the show but the few that I did watch it made me upset to see how she treated him and ran over him in public. I too feel very sad for both of them and especially those 8 babies caught up in it all.

I'll definately check out that book. I'm currently reading Having A Mary Spirit by Joanna Weaver. It's awesome!

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Kelli said...

I totally agree. I really thought that they were going to work it out. It is really sad that they didn't I know for sure that they could have, especially with God on their side.

Another sad part to it is that they just gave the world another reason to look suspiciously at Christians. But that just means that we have to get out there and work just as hard for Him. We have to let people know we aren't perfect. People fail. And people definitely shouldn't judge a whole group based on such a situation as theirs.

p.s. Totally not a lame post!!!!!

monkeymama said...

Just buzzed by your blog. I am also a christian, conservative mom. I have 3 great kids that keep me on my toes and a hubby that all too often gets put on the back burner. I am a floral designer and event planner in Memphis, TN. I will have to read back posts of yours. I just decided to start blogging about my day to day with chronic daily headaches to remind myself that I am not crazy.

Thanks for your posting and it was totally not lame!

Jessika said...

I was blog hopping and came across yours. I love it! I am a Christian women also trying to raise 2 little ones. It does make me sad about Jon and Kate. I loved that show too. I pray that everything works out for the best.

clew said...

Hello :) I too was just bloghopping and ran across yours. Great post! I struggle with this myself ... My first marriage was tyrannical, so I have submission issues. I know this is what I need to do as a Christian wife. But it's difficult at times. Thanks for reminding me.

I enjoyed my visit, I'll be back :)

xoxo <)))><

Olívia Németh said...

Just found your blog, I love it!!

~H~ said...

Hi there,
I just stumbled onto your blog, and after rading this post, decided to "Follow" your blogging journey...I hope that's ok!

I just started a blog a few days ago, I have to say that yours is very inspiring!!

Deb said...

I was also bloghopping and found your blog. I'm a happily married Christian wife and have been for 38years. My husband is still the love of my life after all these years, but believe me, not every single moment has been fodder for a Hallmark card! The key is commitment. Once in Hawaii for an anniversary, someone put a microphone to my husbands mouth and asked him our secret to a long marriage. My love, my dearest friend, didn't say how much he loved and cherished me. He said, "Well, we both made a promise all those years ago...and we keep our word." That's it. Short, sweet, and wraps it up in a nutshell. We still love each other...but it was the commitment to a promise that we made to God and to each other that has kept us strong...and happy. Love your blog...nice to read about young Christian families raising their families!

Mama Mia said...

So true! Thanks for sharing your thoughts-- I find this a recurring theme in most celebrity relationships. The women emasculate the men; the men demean the women.. and it's a vicious cycle. So glad that we have resources (thanks for sharing the book!) to help us get a better perspective on how to have a strong, God-honoring marriage.

Nicole said...

I never liked the interaction between John and Kate, but always thought it was just the exhaustion, etc of parenting 8 little people. And really who doesn't have those grumpy moments with their husbands. I felt almost cheated when they threw in the towel, as Christians living our faith, we are meant to honour our marriage vows. It made me so sad to see the world taking the forefront in their relationship, not God or their children. My heart aches for all of them and I pray for healing, especially for the kids.

tehstotehara said...

As a self labeled Liberal Christian, I would say this post is applicable to Liberals and Conservatives. Marriage is marriage. Sacred vows given to each other and not meant to be broken. I used to watch Jon and Kate as well, because in the beginning it was a cute show about two very in love people trying to get by. Then it started to get more and more about them and all the endorsements, and Kate treating Jon like crap, and that's when I lost interest. I wasn't surprised it didn't work but it is definitely sad.